By Sophia Yakumithis

The 62nd Grammy Awards took place on Sunday, providing both excitement and disappointment in the fashion world. While I did find some looks to be particularly tasteful and striking, I was generally angry with a lot of choices made by this year’s attendees. Here are the looks that infuriated me most. 

Joy Villa. Sweetie, I’m tired of you. Please go away in your ugly sequined Trump dresses. I don’t even know who you are, but you are an eyesore. This is, like, the fourth time she’s worn a gross Party City costume to the most dignified night in music. But I don’t know what else I would expect from someone who wrote a song literally called “Make America Great Again!” Go to bed.

I don’t even want to waste my time on Ricky Rebel, also pro-Trump, who wrote “Impeach this” on his skinny, bare a– in a literal knock off of Lady Gaga’s 2009 VMAs dress. I took personal offense on behalf of Gaga for his fake leather, backless chaps, and felt secondhand embarrassment for him — whoever he is — as he confidently strutted around in a look he should not be confident in. Next. 

Nikita Dragun is someone else with whom I am unfamiliar, but she looked like a nymph in a sleek, white mesh turtleneck gown. The dress looks like it was purchased at Wet Seal, featuring differently shaped (probably fake) pearls cascading down her limbs and the dress’ the center, forming a dramatized feminine figure over the mesh. Dragun, who I learned is a makeup YouTuber, looked like a contoured mess, and just made the rest of her look even cheaper.

Party City must have been a sponsor for the Grammys this year or something because Ashley McBryde strolled down the red carpet in a v-neck, black mesh gown, which resembled a witch costume with spider web patterns running down the body. Hers, however, displayed sweeping rose stems with deep purple flowers with her makeup channelling Morticia Addams… in a bad way. 

I must be seriously out of touch because I don’t know ANY of these people (but they’re at the Grammys and I’m not). Tove Lo, though, was probably in a hurry because her pink, old lady bra was fully exposed underneath a half buttoned grey blazer, which looks like it was made out of rayon. She also forgot to wear eyeliner, making her red-ombre eyeshadow serve as a washing-out agent.

I do actually know who Billie Eilish is. The emo, 18-year-old indie-pop artist wore exactly what I’d predict: a Gucci, oversized black suit — which between a pair of sunglasses AND a face mask exposed no part of her body (mad respect) — with glittery “GG” decals and neon green accents. Beneath the suit was a neon green sequined turtleneck, capped off with clawed gloves. It was weird, baggy and very on-brand for the artist, but that doesn’t change the fact that I am not a fan. 

In the same emo vein, Skrillex looked like a combination of a bar mitzvah DJ and a bodyguard in a black tee shirt tucked into black dress pants. Seeing the EDM artist without sunglasses always makes me thoroughly uncomfortable with a twang of vulnerability, and his hair is short now, exposing his gauged ears. I hate to break it to Skrillex, but his ascendence into adulthood is a transition that he is executing poorly. Either stick with being a goth king or go full dad. But pick one and stick with it. Please.

Although I wish I could drag more innocent lives, I’ll stop here. I think I need a bottle of Scotch or a hot bath. Or both.