By Khalid AlSabhan
Boston University’s precious bundle of joy, Commonwealth Avenue’s four-legged pick-me-up, the heart and soul of our athletic teams. What’s not to like about Rhett? Despite his small stature, Rhett symbolizes loyalty, courage and determination among various other characteristics, all of which BU students should be proud of. It’s no wonder that he’s the most iconic of all college mascots in the Boston area, especially considering that every other mascot around here is no match, right?
I mean, take a look at our neighbor Northeastern’s Paws the Siberian husky. Who do they think they are, also dubbing their mascot a dog, but five years after BU? There can only be one dog in this town. And what kind of dog name is Paws anyways? Simplistic at best. There’s a statue of him that is said to give good luck? Sure, I guess that’s kind of cool. Wait, he’s an animal that’s actually suitable for Boston’s climate? Fine, I guess Paws is a decent mascot.
Well what about Tim the Beaver? MIT is a well-known university, and it’s pretty hard to not admire their work ethic. But their mascot can’t possibly stand up to MIT’s reputation, let alone Rhett’s greatness. Sure, I guess it’s pretty cool that they chose an animal native to the wilderness of Massachusetts. Beavers also happen to be the engineers of the animal kingdom, which is funny because a lot of MIT students are engineers. You know what? Sure, Tim gets a pass.
But surely Rhett is better than Tufts’ Jumbo, right? I mean, who would want an elephant for their mascot? Resilience, patience and wisdom are great values, yeah, but it’s too impractical of a mascot to have wandering campus. Wait, you mean to tell me there used to be a taxidermied elephant on campus that was lost in a fire? His ashes are stored in a peanut butter jar that gives good luck? OK fine, that’s cool.
But there’s plenty more for us to beat. What about the other red university here in Boston, Harvard’s Crimson? This stuck-up university would choose something obnoxiously Harvard-y, right? But their mascot is crimson. Like, the color? Well, no matter, I’m sure that no one would want something as abstract, unique, interesting and curiosity-inducing as that for their mascot.
As for Baldwin the Eagle … BC just doesn’t count.
Looking back on it — Rhett may be inadequate at times. But we love him just the same.
Plus, at least we’re not the Rhode Island School of Design, am I right?