Welcome new Boston University students! Congratulations on choosing such a wonderful school to attend, and for clicking on such a great article to read. You’re probably feeling a mix of two emotions right now: excitement at the thought of becoming an independent college kid in a modern metropolis, and fear due to the fact that being an adult is hard and you have no idea how BU even works. But fear not! You’re not technically an adult until you graduate from college (or at least stop eating at the dining hall), and I’m here to give you a few DOs and DON’Ts for BU students.

First things first, winter here sucks. So DO bring appropriate attire. A note to Californians — UGG boots do not count as proper winter footwear. I know that they may look comfy and warm, but just one step into ankle-deep snow, and BAM. All you’re left with are soggy feet and musty UGGs.

DO take advantage of the dining hall, if you know what I mean (wink wink, nudge nudge). The school allows you to take one piece of fruit with you after each meal, so be sure to take some cookie or Fritos-shaped fruit back to your dorm to enjoy later.

These DO's and DONT's will make the adjustment to life at BU a lot easier. PHOTO VIA FLICKR USER HENRY ZBYSZYNSKI

These DO’s and DONT’s will make the adjustment to life at BU a lot easier. PHOTO VIA FLICKR USER HENRY ZBYSZYNSKI

DO NOT go to the dining hall when it’s the most crowded. This ranges between 11:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. and 6:00 p.m. to 7:30 p.m. most days. Avoiding these times guarantees you a table and shorter lines for food. Plus, you won’t be left with your hands full, desperately wandering around the dining hall looking for an open seat. Also, blot the pizza before you put it in your mouth.

DO NOT spend too much money on things from a certain city-based convenience store. Yes, I understand that sometimes you don’t care how much you pay for disinfecting wipes because the pet chinchilla you snuck into your dorm just had an accident on your roommate’s desk and you’d like to get the rodent urine out of your room as soon as possible. But usually, you can get food and supplies MUCH cheaper at the Star Market just past West Campus or the CVS in Central. Plus, even though the prices are still pretty high at Buick Street Market, you can use dining points to buy things other than food, which is great because that’s basically like spending imaginary money.

DO leave your room. It’s not too difficult to make friends, but it’s a little difficult for them to find you if you lock yourself in your room after classes with only Netflix and Cheetos to keep you company. Once you inevitably make some friends, please leave campus regularly.

Now for some etiquette. First, DO NOT walk slowly or take up the entire sidewalk with your cute new friends. I don’t care how many of you there are, just get into a proper formation when you see someone walking down the sidewalk.

DO NOT take the elevator to floors four through seven in Warren Towers. I don’t care if you’re exhausted and your backpack weighs twenty pounds or you’ve been walking all day, you can walk an extra thirty seconds to your room. Plus, exercise is good for you! Yay! Speaking of dorms, DO NOT smoke things in your room, in the stairwell or the parking garage. The smell lingers for days and Febreze doesn’t work. Also, don’t live in Warren next year.

DO NOT eat in the library. Don’t bring a four-course meal into Mugar Library, because I will hate you if you do. And so will everyone else, I guess. While I’m on the topic of Mugar, if you actually want to study, DO NOT go to Mugar’s third floor. I’ve never been desperate enough to go there myself, so I’ve only heard stories from those who have. I heard that one time, a guy slept on top of a table for an hour and a half uninterrupted until his own snoring woke him up. I’ve also heard that if you’re not careful, you might accidentally step on two people engaged in very intense cuddling. During finals it’s all that plus sleep-deprived students who’ve been in there so long they’ve forgotten what the sun is.

DO NOT feel like you have to party. I’ve been to a grand total of one college party. I’m a loser too. It’s okay. But if you are looking to party, DO NOT go to Allston until you’re ready. And don’t go alone. It is a strange and magical place, but be careful.

DO join the Daily Free Press Blog. We’re cool, you’re cool. It’s a perfect fit.

There. Now you know how to properly conduct yourself when you come to BU in the fall. A few final things: don’t piss off your roommate, don’t take 8:00 a.m. classes and don’t let anyone see your lanyard. Ever. Enjoy your year here! Oh, and watch out for the bikes.