By Sarah Burstein, Staff Writer
Just putting it out there: there is no human being on this earth that loves Thanksgiving more than I do. Every year I wake up early, put the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade on TV, blast the Christmas music station (much to the disdain of my Jewish parents), and adorn my house in autumn-scented candles. And of course, there’s the food. There aren’t many holidays where the food is as central of a component as it is for Thanksgiving.
While I love eating my weight in mashed potatoes just as much as the next person, there are some Thanksgiving dishes that are just plain overrated. I feel like it’s gotten to the point where we’re all just afraid to admit that we don’t like these “quintessential” foods. Well, I’m here to change that, and present to you the most overrated Thanksgiving dishes that I will definitely be passing on this year.
1. Green bean casserole
Sorry Campbell’s, but this has always been a no for me. I’m all for including some tasty vegetable amongst the carbo-fest that is Thanksgiving dinner, but seriously? Whose idea was it to take the most unappealing canned soup (cream of mushroom? How about let’s not?) and combine it with green beans? You know you just end up picking the fried onions off the top, so let’s just skip it all together this year.
2. Canned cranberry sauce
After growing up with some pretty awesome homemade cranberry chutney every Thanksgiving (thanks, mom!), it baffles me that people still prefer canned cranberry sauce. Pro-tip: If you can see the markings of the packaging on whatever food you’re eating, you shouldn’t eat it.
Ladies and gentlemen, please make an effort with your vegetables, because there is nothing sadder at a Thanksgiving dinner than some depressing salad leaves with some Newman’s Own balsamic vinaigrette on top.
Woahhh, controversial! All I’m saying is that it takes a lot of work to make a good turkey, and it’s really easy to make it dry and unappetizing. Also, the pilgrims may not have even eaten turkey at their first Thanksgiving, so honestly, what’s the point? After all, you may eat turkey for the principle of Thanksgiving, but everyone knows you’re going up for second helpings of sides, and that leftover turkey is for morning-after sandwiches.
5. Pumpkin pie
Now, don’t get too angry with me on this one. I love a good pie (if you’re anti-pie in totality, check out Shannon’s blog post), and I love pumpkin everything, but combining the two always leaves me disappointed. Every year, I give pumpkin pie a chance, but its weird gelatinous texture makes me sad.
I hope this quick guide on foods to skip will help you make the most of your Thanksgiving dinner this year. Obviously, the real purpose of Thanksgiving is to give thanks, so show some extra love for whoever’s cooking your dinner this year—even if they do make green bean casserole.