By Katrina Uy, Staff Writer

Who needs laughter and chemistry when you’ve got bribery?/PHOTO VIA Wikimedia Commons

Just how far are you willing to go to find Mr. Right or the girl of your wildest dreams?

A controversial new dating app called “Carrot Dating” hit the market last week. Its website states: “Gifts are the greatest ‘ice breaker.’ Carrot Dating turns ‘fat chance’ into ‘why not?’ From flowers to jewelry, there’s a bribe for everyone’s budget. You can have anyone! All you have to do is dangle the right carrot.’”

Yep, you read right. Brandon Wade, creator of the app and graduate of Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) believes that in order to get someone to go on a date with you all you have to do is bribe them with money. Forget all those silly things that relationships are usually based off of, like similar interests and whether or not you and your partner have chemistry. All anyone cares about is the money you shower them with!

Originally repulsed by the idea but still somewhat curious, I decided to download the app for myself and see if it was as bad as it seems.

Spoiler alert: It is, but the outrageousness of some of the bribes is worth the laugh.

After logging in, the app gives you the option to say whether you’re male or female and allows you to input your sexual orientation by choosing if you want to find singles in your area who are either male or female. Then, it presents you with a variety of suitors to choose from and gives you the option to bribe them after choosing one of five categories: dining, activities, gifts, entertainment, or popular.

I decided to go with “gift.” Options ranged from a box of chocolates to plastic surgery treatment. Some of my personal favorites from all five categories include a sky-diving trip, a tattoo, a tank of gas, and even plastic surgery treatment.

Admittedly, while a sky-diving trip does sound awesome, it won’t be enough to get me to go on a date with you. Tempting, but no. Just no.

The concept behind “Carrot Dating” likens both men and women to greedy goblins (Halloween pun) who only want your money. It teaches us that if at first we can’t succeed with our natural charm, wit, and looks, try, try again – and this time, with bribery.

But even if you do manage to get someone to bite, how long do you expect your relationship last? Any relationship built on manipulation and bribery is probably destined for failure from the start.

Money can’t buy you happiness, and it certainly can’t buy you love, either – although if you’ve got the greens to spare and are that desperate to find someone to date you, I guess it’s always worth a shot.