By Danny McCarthy, Staff Writer

When the whether takes a turn halfway through the day, you need to be prepared./PHOTO via Danny McCarthy

As the calendar flips to October, we should know what to expect, weather-wise: chilly days, pumpkin-spice lattes and thick sweaters. Nope. The weather is broken. And the weather isn’t like my iPhone; I can’t turn it off and turn it back on, in the hopes that the problem will be fixed. And when we can’t fix something, we must adjust.

As a guy, I have so few layers to work with already, and it’s made even more perilous by a temperature that changes numbers faster than T-Swift changes boyfriends. It’s like a square dance of “hot and cold, hot and cold.” I need to make each piece of clothing work, because: one, I won’t be beaten by the weather and two, I’m not going to get changed. I have to pay for my laundry now.

So, if you are similarly afflicted by stubborn pride and a small wallet, then this How-To is for you!

How To Dress When the Weather Is Cray:

1. Button-downs: How have we not bowed down to the mystical powers of the button-down? I recently wore a chambray (like denim, but slightly more pretentious) button-down and was pleasantly surprised by how breathable the fabric was. Button-downs often have a more defined figure than your average t-shirt, so it structures your shoulders into appearing broader and squarer than they might usually be.

2. Loose shirts: For the love of everything sacred, avoid tight clothing. I’ll be the first to admit: I’m a human being and I sweat. And sometimes, when it’s hot or I’m hurrying somewhere, I sweat more. Tight shirts cling to your body, making it all the more obvious when you’re gross and sweaty. Go for a looser t-shirt and roll up the cuffs of your sleeves to give it a slightly more tailored look in the arms, which are uber important.

3. Pants: If I know it’s going to be cold in the morning and hot in the afternoon, I opt for pants. I’d rather be comfortable than cold in the morning. Lately, I’ve been obsessed with rolling up the cuffs of my pants. I would normally roll my eyes at those idiots, but if you know how to do it right, it works. My advice? Roll with fitted pants and only roll enough that your ankles are exposed. No one needs to see your calves in their unholy glory. Have some class.

Are we all ready to brave the tumultuous twists of Boston weather? Just remember to be smart; pack a sweater if you’re going with a t-shirt for the mornings and roll your cuffs to keep cool.

May the Fashion be with you, Padawans!